I need to know who you are: the problem with the first person

C. and I had a chat about one of the pieces I read at Illicit Ink earlier in the year. He said he thought it worked better as a spoken piece than a written one but couldn’t tell me why. I asked if it was because that it was in the first person. It has very little personal information about the narrator except that she has breasts and wears a bra. When I am on stage reading it, I become that woman – the first person is automatically my person – so the audience knows what she looks like, how old she is, where she’s from. None of that information is in the story. Many of my first-person pieces leave social context out: they are not about what I consider to be gender-, age- or class-specific experiences so that info feels redundant.

An early story of mine, and one of my personal favourites, Neon Tetra Suicides, didn’t originally specify the gender of the narrator. In my head, he was a man, but it didn’t matter to the story. It was about someone staying at friends’ while their flat was empty. What happened didn’t depend on the narrator’s age, class, nationality, race, sexuality or gender*. After reading an editor’s blog which said something along the lines of ‘Don’t send me a story where the narrator is ambiguous or doesn’t have a name’ I added gender indicators. My guy turned into a woman. Well, he turned into someone who goes to business meetings in skirts and tights. There’s still no name but we assume gender from the clothing. (Even with gender indications, Neon Tetras doesn’t sell so uncertainty about who the narrator is obviously isn’t its only problem. But that’s another story.)

But why should that matter?” C. asked me after I suggested that the lack of biographical content was why he preferred Mouth spoken. And that’s the question. I don’t know why, but I know that it does. Last December, I had a 100-word first-person story published online and in the comments one reader asked if the narrator was a man or a woman. For 100 words I didn’t think the gender mattered: either sex can milk cows and chop up frozen zombies with a chain saw. That’s just country living. But my audience clearly did think it was important.

I was asked to change the gender of Mouth‘s narrator for Liar’s League Hong Kong. It took very little effort. I changed a breast to a nipple, a top to a shirt and removed a reference to bras. The gender of the narrator can’t have been that important to the core of the story if that was all it took. For the performance it makes all the difference, however: it was read by a man and that man embodies the narrator.

Unfortunately, I can’t think of any short first-person stories that I have read where I didn’t know basic biographical information about the narrator so I can’t tell whether I, too, want to know these things. That same fact makes me think that I do or more writers would leave them out. My perspective isn’t that of a pepper corn in a salt cellar: I’m not a uniquely socially blind individual. If I don’t think it’s necessary in the stories I write, that’s probably because I already know. I have an image in my head, one clear enough to satisfy my needs for detail. I need to remember to share that image, no matter how sketchy, with my audience. I don’t want to lose them to unnecessary questions.

 

* Saying that, there are some indications of age – the friends have children – and class – the narrator attends business meetings and mostly works from home on a laptop.

 

Looming Hills and Radiant Water in Blank Fiction Magazine

Imagine Scotland. Hills covered in heather, gorse and bracken are polkadotted with sheep and cattle. Between them nestle fertile valleys. Outside of the bustling cities, people live tranquil lives in the countryside, making their living along the coast and on islands in the sea. The coast is rich with crabs and mussels, the forests team with deer and the fields are full of pheasant. The biggest natural predator is the fox which thrives in city and country alike. The most famous predator is probably the Scottish wildcat, a cute and feisty tabby with impressive hunting skills. Humans rule supreme and they husband a sometimes harsh but always rich environment.

But what if this wasn’t quite true? What is sheep were protection, not just a source of food and clothing? What if the wildcat was more than it seemed?

Emma grew up on Skye but moved to Glasgow when she was a child. She knows how to stay safe on the island: she knows the rules. All islanders do but they keep their business to themselves. People on the mainland don’t know anything of the dangers the islanders deal with. Then Emma’s best friend moves to Skye to paint for six months. How can she keep her safe?

Blank Fiction Magazine‘s first horror edition is out now. I’m delighted that Looming Hills and Radiant Water is one of the four stories in this issue. Blank Fiction Magazine is available from the Apple Newsstand and their own website. It’s only $1 per issue.

Blank Fiction Magazine Horror
My feral cat is in horrifically good company

The joy of learning and the sadness of analysis

Neil Gaiman’s one of my favourite writers. I’m also rather in awe of his ability to tell a story and manage an audience. Put him on a stage and let him go – there’s an event, right there. Gaiman’s brilliant with kids and takes their questions seriously even when the adults around them want to groan. (Gaiman’s Edinburgh kids events are usually full of adult fans. I know: I’ve been one of them.)

I saw Gaiman when he was in Edinburgh earlier this year, at The Truth is a Cave in the Black Mountain. I really enjoyed the story, Gaiman’s reading, FourPlay’s music and Eddie Campbell’s art. (The marketing annoyed me a little: I wouldn’t call what is essentially a magic lantern show “a revolutionary new concept of synchronised multi-media storytelling“. But there you go.) It was a good show.

Hin Leung reads Mouth at Liar’s League Hong Kong

Liar’s League’s website says “Writer’s write. Actors read. Audience listens. Everyone wins.” Although I have been known to read my own words on stage, I thoroughly agree that having an actor read them is better for everyone. A professional can add nuances and feeling to my words that I cannot. When I read what I write, the words always mean the same. In someone else’s mouth, they can take on a different meaning.

Also, not all writers are great readers. Some should never red their own stories because they cannot do them justice. And that’s fine. Putting emotion onto a page is a very different skill from pulling it off that page and projecting it into the world. Liar’s League take a writer’s words and gives them to  an actor who performs them for an audience. I think it’s a great idea.

I sent a story to Liar’s League London earlier in the year. They didn’t want it, but, to my great pleasure, passed it on to Liar’s League Hong Kong, who did. In a couple of weeks, Hin Leung will read Mouth, a story about a young man with something growing in his side, to an audience. I wish I could be there! The event might be recorded: I really hope it is because I’d love to hear how Hin brings my words to life.

Liar’s League Hong Kong

Liar’s League presents Here & Queer
When: 29:00, October 27, 2014.
Where: The Dairy, The Fringe Club, Wyndham St, Central, Hong Kong

Celebrating Ada Lovelace day: Lady Scientists Stitch & B*tch at Royal Observatory Edinburgh

It gives me great pleasure to announce that Royal Observatory Edinburgh has invited the Lady Scientists to help them celebrate Ada Lovelace day on October 14th.

Madame Lovelace, in whose honor we are invited, is highly conscious of the honor the world has paid her in naming a day for her. I’m convinced she’ll give a spirited account of herself on the night. Madame Sommerville, her old friend, is also delighted to attend. She doesn’t get to see her darling Ada, or indeed her  dear Florence, nearly as often as she would like. Travel becomes more difficult with age, as I am well aware. It is rare that Mademoiselle Nightingale can be tempted away from the hotel she calls home, but she’s promised to tear herself away from her statistical endeavors. I expect Madame Darwin will join us, as usual. She’s a shy one, is Emma Darwin. Not so madame Payne-Gaposchkin, who is rather free with her opinions. She has expressed her interest in the observatory itself, and its facilities.

Of course, without the chronologist who brings us all together our soirés are not possible and we do so enjoy them. It is good to know that she keeps her equipment in working order. A rigorous approach and attention to detail is crucial to good science.

Lady Scientists Stitch & B*tch takes place at Royal Observatory Edinburgh, on Blackford Hill. The event starts at 18:30 and is free, but ticketed. To reserve a seat, email vis@roe.ac.uk.

I hope to see you there.

Sincerely,

Marie Curie signature

Appearing on a stage near you soon: Technobabble

One of the things that The Lady Scientists taught me is that I cannot easily learn a script. Not easily – but I can. Glowing with joy at having learned 1,700 words and remembered them when it mattered, I signed up for Illicit Ink‘s next Underground event, Technobabble. All I have to learn for that is 1,000 words.

I felt confident about doing so until I sent the organisers my story yesterday. I only have two weeks. Gasp!

It won’t be a problem. The structure of the piece is such that it should be relatively easy to learn and for most of it, it’s not important that I retell it verbatim.

Writing the piece for this performance was fun and let me play with an idea I’ve had for a while. Usually, I write something and hope to be able to sell it on after performing it. Not this time. This is written as a one off. My aim is to do a performance, feel confident on stage and prove to myself that I can learn a short text. That’s it. There will be no dancing, but there might be sound effects. And a feeling of achievement.

Illicit Ink Underground Technobabble

The Bongo Club
66 Cowgate

Sunday October 5, 20:00 – 22:00

The lady scientists come to Women in Engineering Day at Heriot-Watt University

Next Friday, September 12, 2014, The Lady Scientist Stitch and B*tch, will be performed for the second time. This time, we’re at Heriot-Watt University as part of Women in Engineering Day. We have a tweaked script and some new performers. We have practised on site (a rare treat! Thank you HWU.) and now we’re each doing what we can to perfect our performances and remember our lines.

I’m really looking forward to performing again.

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the Lady Scientists’ Bitch and Stitch.

Lady Scientist poster at HWU
Look! That’s me, on that poster. There. Next to the woman with the boot.

Meet Makiruku the kappa

Kappas are Japanese water demons who sometimes eat people, sometimes help them. Their skulls have an interesting shape: a bowl at the top is full of water that gives them strength. Kappas can be malevolent and spiteful but they are always very polite. And that’s useful: in case the one you meet isn’t a nice helpful kappa, bow deeply. It will bow too and spill the water in its skull bowl, spilling its energy and strength.

This is Makiruku. He turned up in the Bristol channel one day.

Makiruku, the kappa

There’s no deadline so I’ll write what I like

This is sound writing advice: finish.

As an aspiring writer, you hear it a lot. The logic is sound. If you don’t finish a project, you can’t send it anywhere. Taking the logic to its extreme, you should never give up in the middle of something but always soldier on though and make sure you get to the end.

Sod that.

I showed my writer’s group a short story that I’d been working on. I knew it wasn’t entirely coherent and I knew why. It started as a short idea, something that could be covered in 1,500 words, say. But the story grew and veered off in a different, winding direction. I needed advice: should I cut it right back (at the time, it was 7,500 words long) or should I keep going?

Writer’s group said keep going. That was what I wanted to do, so did it was easy advice to follow.

As a result, I’ve left my other projects unfinished. At first, I felt bad about doing that, but then a friend of mine pointed out that no one is waiting for them to be finished. There is no deadline, no agent or publisher anxious to see my work, so I might as well focus on what I am most interested in at the moment. Wise words.

It will be interesting to see if I get sidetracked on to something else before this one’s finished too. I hope not – that would be too much like a pattern and would force me to conclude that I’m rubbish at finishing.

At 19,360 words I’m about 1/3 through the project. I’m still enthusiastic about it and I’m pressing on.

Lady Scientists stitch again?

In April, we performed Lady Scientist Stitch and B*tch as part of the Science Festival. Somewhere between a reading and a play, the performance saw six scientists talking to each other about their careers and lives.

We heard nice things from the audience, but we, the performers, really enjoyed writing the stories and working together. Collaboration is rewarding and you always create something bigger than when you work alone. We have been looking at ways to take the stories further and were hoping to do a repeat – improved – performance at some point. We’re looking at weaving the stories more tightly together, maybe adding other scientists and, to avoid confusion in the knitting community, renaming it ‘B*tch and Stitch‘.

Just after that first performance, the idea that we might do it again was exhilarating but the reality felt far away. Now it feels more real since we’re in discussions about a second and possibly third performance.

Watch this space.